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April 14, 2012

Yes!! My children DO want me, and I want them too!

This post is a response to the article, "Your Children Want You".

 Photo obtained from Google

A few weeks ago, you may remember me posting about my frustrations with technology. I had written it after having a conversation with my sisters and mom about how sick we were of social media, and the affects it had on us. It was a short post because I couldn't put into words how I was feeling. I was feeling that I was in a permanent 'slump' and what I thought was possible Seasonal Affective Disorder was really my self-esteem going down hill.

A few days later, I had the same conversation with one of my great friends. She felt the same way I did about how social media is taking over our lives and causing us to feel 'belittled' and 'not good enough' as wife and mothers. It was after that when I came home and decided that I was going to take a break. I drastically cut back on the time I spent on Pinterest, Facebook, and even blogs. I was so sick of comparing myself to others and more importantly, I was sick of putting others, and others' opinions in front of my family and family's opinions. I was starting to lose sight of who I really was.

A few days ago, I read the article. The article that is circulating around the web, "Your Children Want You". Since reading that article my mind has been pondering. Everything that was written in that article was put perfectly. If you have not yet read it, I reccommend doing so now.

After reading that article it clicked, "That's why I had been feeling so inferior. That's why I had been feeling so 'worthless' or 'not good enough'." It is like a breath of fresh air knowing that there are other mothers out there that feel the same why I feel. I am grateful for that article and that it surfaced at a time when I needed it most.

Since cutting back on Facebook, and even Pinterest, I've noticed a wonderful change in all aspects of my life. My attitude, mood, self-esteem, and quality of life had all become better. I find that I am happy because my sweet girls are tugging on my pants asking me to play with them. I'm happy when my husband gets home from work and I am actually dressed in normal clothes and have make-up on. Altogether, at the end of the day, I'm mostly happy because I have found myself again. I know who I am. I lost myself because I was getting too caught up in who I was supposed to be based on how everyone else viewed me. That I was so 'crafty' and that everything in my life was nearly perfect.  Well, if that's how you view me, you're wrong.

Having a blog is fun. It is something I started doing during nap time, when I had nothing else to do. It soon wasn't just a pass-time though. I started blogging more and more and it became more of a chore just so I could keep up with other bloggers. But ahem, have you ever compared my blog to all the big blogs out there?? It does not compare!! But that's okay, I've come to terms with that! There are so many talented people out there that have a lot more time than I do and probably have older kids that are in school. I, on the on the other hand, am only 26, and have a 36 month old and a 13 month old. I still am changing diapers for goodness sakes!! I am going to be honest, it would be awesome to do one project without any interruptions from the kids, but I know that's not going to happen for a long time, and that's okay. I'd rather color Dora pictures with Charli anyways!

I'm not going to measure my success on how others think of me. The success in my life is reflected by how my family views me. Just like the article above states, my children love me, and they don't care how good I am at braiding hair or baking cakes! They think the world of me. They are smart and they are learning so much every day. That's how I measure my success, teaching them the things they need to know, and loving them.  However, they're teaching me more than I'm teaching them!!

The point of this post is to help you see the importance of my family in my life. If you are considering taking a social media break, do it. If you are feeling like you are not good enough, crafty enough, not a good enough cook, and know nothing when it comes to interior decorating...don't feel that way. I promise no one is as domestic as Martha Stewart. In fact, I'm sure Martha Stewart isn't even as domestic and glorious as she seems!

Though on the internet we can portray our lives as being 'perfect', people can see through that. If you think my life is all lemons, it's not. I would feel bad if anyone ever looked at my blog and felt inferior. I. Am. Not. That. Crafty!! I don't have it all together. Yeah, so at times I get good ideas and they actually turn out so I post them on my blog, but other times, they fail, and I don't post about them! The other day I was making oatmeal cookies and guess what?? They were as flat as pancakes!! Just when I thought I had mastered the 'non-pancake' cookie!! And did you know I have a huge stash of junk in one of my kitchen cabinets?? One day I may pull up that pin I pinned on Pinterest about how to de-clutter and reorganize!!  Did you know that I haven't even decorated the bedrooms in my house? ...I don't really have any motivation to either! Also, if you were to stop by my house on a regular day you would walk into a messy house. Chances are I will still be in my sweats with no make-up on, and breakfast will not be cleaned up yet!

I am going to start posting more 'real' things on my blog so you know that I make mistakes and do not have it all together!  I want my blog to be a place where you can go for real ideas and I never want you to feel like you're not good enough. The way I see it is if you are happy with yourself and have people around you who love you, you don't need the approval of anyone else!
"You is kind, you is smart, you is important." -The Help

I am so grateful for you and your support to me and my blog! Without my readers, I would have no inspiration to my spare time! I hope you don't mind that I don't update every day or even regularly for that matter, and thank you for understanding that my family comes first!


Koni said...

Bravo!! Well said! Thanks so much for sharing!

Becky said...

What a refreshing post for all of us! Thanks for putting things back into perspective!

hoLLY said...

love it!!i have felt this way as well and i love how you word it all!! amen sista!!

Holy Craft said...

Good for yoU! It was a great article that I hope inspired many others to stop trying to be someone they aren't, but just to be who they are...that's all they need! Looks like you realized that.

Funky Momma said...

THANK YOU for sharing this post, and your post as well! I, too, was down-in-the-dumps and could not figure out why. I constantly felt I did not measure up as a mom. Especially as I have an illness that leaves me fatigued and unable to do what I plan to, some of the time. THANK YOU!!!

Shay said...

Thanks for sharing! I have had the same thoughts lately. Yes, I want to have a successful blog, but I don't have the time to spend on it. I have other important things to accomplish. My blog has to come last...I feel better since I decided that!

Shana Banana said...

I'm not perfect either!! Three cheers for us non perfect ladies:) I quit trying to prove my points on social media a couple of years I just use it as a place to pray over people. Life is simpler now:)

Brandi said...

Thanks for sharing this! I have been feeling crazy lately, and this totally helped! :)

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